“I’m sorry – you wanna send Roman out into the field?!”
Because just a couple of episodes ago, he was a sociopath killing machine whose mission in life was the destruction of the entire country, but now he’s just a trigger-happy amnesiac with a grudge, let’s get him suited up, no?
Well, yes, according to Jane, who keeps inanely repeating that “Roman solved a tattoo!” as if (a) her batteries need changing and (b) Patterson, the person who actually did solve the tattoo, isn’t standing right there with “Uh no, girlfriend” written all over her face.
Not that Kurt will have anyone telling Jane “Uh no, girlfriend” but himself. Initially resistant – because he is not COMPLETELY INSANE – to the idea of recent Sandstorm devotee Sadface McWhinyPants bringing his unique skillset to Team Tat, he changes his mind as soon as Evil Dr Sun tries to nix the idea; suddenly Assistant Director Weller’s all “yeah, dude, into the field you go” and btw, “thank you for helping us.” And not killing us, I guess.
The plan, then, is for Roman – chaperoned by his very jealous little sister – to try and wangle his way back in with the local Friends of Sandstorm biker gang (every procedural loves a biker gang) via flame-haired old, er, flame Kat Jarret, the gang’s second-in-command. While Jane’s busy trying a darker lip – striking, but maybe not for the office, hon – however, Roman decides to accelerate the plan in such a way that Kurt and Reade get shot (in the vest, relax everyone), Kalinda and the FBI “accidentally” supply Sandstorm with just enough of just the right kind of rare explosive they need, and the biker gang all end up dead. Oopsie.
But how did Shepherd outwit poor old Team Tat this time? Kalinda suggests it’s because “I’m clouding your judgement and you’re clouding mine,” dumping Kurt with all the emotion of an impulse shopper returning a dubious-looking handbag to the department store. Patterson, who probably has every season of “24” on DVD, ventures a different explanation, though – “maybe there’s another mole?” Yes, Patterson – it’s KALINDA. I’ve been saying this for weeks. The irony, if I’m right, being that, as Kalinda sabotages the FBI for Sandstorm, there’s an excellent chance that former mole Borden may now be sabotaging Sandstorm for the FBI – or did I completely misunderstand all his weird “just totally changing the plan, nothing to see here” hostility towards Random Evil Henchman? Hmm.
Either way, now we’re at just about the mid-season mark, everything’s simmering nicely. Kurt, now Allie-free, baby-free and Kalinda-free, is back to making soulful eyes at one Jane Doe. Ms Doe, meanwhile, having spent most of the ep determined to convince everyone Roman’s a big old softie, gets her wake-up call when Kat dies in his arms and he barely stops to adjust his beard, thereby clearing the way for her to stop nagging Weller about her brother’s incarceration and start cozying back up to the big lug in her own right instead. (Squee!) And Patterson knows that something’s off with Kalinda which means that Patterson, will, at some point, start working out exactly what that something is. (Hurrah!) All of which – apart from Jane’s initial idiocy over Roman, and Reade having the stupidest Surprise! Sex! scene I’ve seen outside HBO – adds up to a pacy, decent episode which I did enjoy, albeit possibly more for what it suggested might be on the way than what it actually involved.