I love Containment but subtlety isn’t on the list of reasons why; this week’s terrific episode is called “A Time to Be Born” and that means exactly what you think it means -Teresa’s finally gone into labour. Which in turn means that Sam and Jana are on midwife duties, Xander’s in the waiting room/ quarantine/ porch, hoping for the best, and the self-obsessed Suze’s still annoying everyone senseless.
Conditions obviously aren’t ideal: labour seems to be messing with Teresa’s memory – she keeps calling for her mum, apparently having forgotten how and why her mum had to leave in the first place – and freaking everyone else out, but Sam, in his usual resourceful way makes a stethoscope out of a balloon (look, me neither, but it was great), and Suze, having sent Dennis away to die a lonely (entirely preventable if he hadn’t been such a jerk) death, finally pulls both herself and an uncharacteristically panicky Jana together long enough to actually be of some use. Team Data Recovery just about manage to hold the fort on their own then, till the absolutely glorious moment when Officer Jake turns up (bearing a box of goodies from that gang leader who’s weirdly obsessed with pregnant women) to save the day yet again. “Just tell me they train cops to…”says the suddenly-overwhelmed Sam. “They do,” says the supremely calm, never-been-more-attractive-and-that-is-saying-something Jake, striding into Clean Room Three, all “Hey, remember me? It looks like you might be having a baby, which is great news because I actually know how to deliver babies, okay? I’ve just been waiting for an opportunity.”
Anyone who didn’t guess the baby would be named after Teresa’s mum needs to watch more TV. Those of us who did guess might well still have been charmed by the DIY crib though. Bless. If, after all this handiness, Sam proves Jed right and turns out to be a lunatic axe murdering rapist, I’m going to be very disappointed albeit, for now, I have much stronger feelings than disappointment to worry about.
Before we get to my anguish, though, we’ve a conspiracy to check in on. Lex and Lommers are out of quarantine and, oh sure, they’re fine; Lommers barely stops to change silk blouses before cheerfully showing off a tent full of dying guardsmen to the media, wrapping it up in Trump-esque “We will save America!” rhetoric so they’ll lap it and her up yet again. Lex, meanwhile, having reconnected with the now-buoyant Leo (the man loves it when a conspiracy comes together), is disconcerted to find out his new BFF Dr L might be a stone-cold serial killer – I still think her husband might be the one responsible for the virus mind you, even if she clearly knows how it all came about – and sends Jake to track down the smoking paperwork, only to find Meese has already turned it to ashes. The flinty-eyed Lommers promises she’ll resign tomorrow anyway, but let’s not hold our breaths behind our surgical masks, shall we? I’m guessing she’ll still have a trick or two left up those immaculately-tailored sleeves.
While Lommers seems destined to fight on, however, poor Katie might not be so lucky. Being stuck in one of the hospital’s observation rooms might have clipped a less determined character’s wings considerably, but no, our Katie hardly misses a beat this week, still managing to parent Quentin, berate Cannerts and be adorable with Jake throughout the episode. Watching her and Jake together, gabbing and gazing through the glass is both swoonsomely lovely and desperately sad, given that what happens at the end of the episode is so horribly inevitable; after all, “Containment” clearly isn’t scared of finishing what it starts and, whether your references are Biblical or lyrical, “A time to be born” also means “a time to die.” Which in turn means we only have three more episodes to go, Katie may not even have that long and this show’s going to rip me up into tiny little pieces, isn’t it? *Sob.*