Abby needs to speak to Fitz urgently – so urgently that she interrupts him in the Presidential limo in the middle of a makeout session with Lillian-the-journalist. He’s “wild carding”: i.e. he’s gone off the reservation, logistically speaking, in his pursuit of romance. There need to be plans for this sort of thing: the Football has to be nearby, as do trauma vehicles and security staff. So, yes, POTUS does need to consult widely before he can get laid. Abby addresses this with increasing levels of insolence during the episode, presumably calculating that Fitz won’t fire her, or alternatively she doesn’t care. I do care: I’d quite like her to get shitcanned and go back to work with OPA, but that doesn’t happen.
Cyrus – who might or might not be shtupping Tom, of all people – has decided to hitch his wagon to Governor Francisco Vargas’s star, but there’s a problem: no-one’s heard of him, apart from those of us who saw him under a different name in Desperate Housewives. Well, removing that kind of obstacle is introductory-level Cyrus, the sort of thing he’d do just to rub the sleep out of his eyes. And sure enough: there’s a plot, someone is blackmailed, people are killed, the Governor is held at gunpoint, and a child is left without a father. All in a day’s work, and by the end of that particular day everyone’s heard of Governor Vargas. And meantime, in Bizarro-Scandal, David Rosen is sleeping with Susan Ross, who has confirmed that she’s running for the Oval, and with Elizabeth. (Not, yet, at the same time.) Except he isn’t, because despite what the writers think he wouldn’t do that sort of thing. At least there’s a hint that he likes Susan rather more than he’s letting on, and that Elizabeth cares rather more than she’s letting on. Otherwise this storyline would just be 100% appalling.
What’s remarkable about ‘Wild Card’, though, is just how dull it is. I wouldn’t have thought that an episode of TV with POTUS-based rumpy-pumpy, a future Presidential candidate being held hostage, Cyrus plotting and scheming, and David Rosen bed-hopping could be boring, but it is. The best moment, replete with both intentional and unintentional comedy, is when Olivia insists that everything’s entirely under control with Rowan and her fuck-buddy. “Jake and my father”, she snaps at Huck, “aren’t up to anything”. Huck rightly invites her to repeat that sentence so that she can hear for herself how ludicrous it is. Thing is, though, Olivia’s many things, but stupid she isn’t. Or wasn’t. Fortunately by the end she’s started to remember who she is, and has OPA spying on Jake’s girlfriend.