Stalker goes back to school this week, with a thoroughly unpleasant story set at the L.A. Academy for the Annoying.
A hapless Coach is stalked and almost killed, a teenage boy is pushed and almost killed – there’s a lot of almost killing going on, with unfortunate student Jenny being blamed and bullied for it by the entire school. Which seriously sucks for unfortunate student Jenny, since high school has apparently now morphed into a mediaeval torture chamber with phones and social media as the modern-day equivalent of thumbscrews and the rack.
Of course, bearing in mind the delicate issues involved, TAU deal with things as sensitively as ever, with Janice, and Beth too – although not quite as much as Janice, who seems ready to stab him in the face – openly hostile to Coach Victim and clearly blaming him for, in no particular order, being a bit keen on himself, being stalked and being almost killed.
“You didn’t do anything that would make her think you’d be receptive?” queries the disbelieving Beth. “Well, ignoring her advances might have caused her to escalate,” suggests the inexplicably furious Janice.” Um….. what? “I see a little judgement on your face,” understates the beleaguered Coach.
Oh, dude. If you think this is bad, just wait till they see the sex tape.
As Beth and Janice harangue the victim, meanwhile, grumpy old man Jack interviews a succession of obnoxious students, looking increasingly baffled as to how they know the answers to his questions. I don’t know, Jack, maybe they use their eyes, their ears and their internet connection? Kind of like you and Desk Cop Ben do? No?
Obviously, things get worse and worse for poor Jenny while the team flail around, ignoring this week’s culprit because, presumably, they think s/he can’t possibly be the same one as last week’s. Psyche! Shows what the team know, since apparently s/he can indeed, thanks to a truly ridiculous twist, straight out of some terrible 80’s pot-boiler that would have covered it with a lot more panache than this episode did. Blerg.
Since the A-plot is so nasty and stupid, then, the only fun to be had comes from the unexpectedly deep yet entirely one-sided stalker-love between Perry and Ray the Lunatic.
Holed up in a hotel room together, an adoring, excited Perry watches Ray sleep, ready with a buffet-in-a-bag of breakfast options for when he wakes up, along with clothes, toiletries and presumably his favorite chew-toy – aw, it would almost be sweet, if they weren’t both homicidal maniacs. The awestruck Perry just wants to hole up with his hero for a spell, but even Ray – the Lunatic – is weirded out by this. “I’m not staying here with you in this room for a few weeks,” he says, firmly, and off he goes, leaving Perry to throw himself on his twin bed, clutch his pillow, and wonder sulkily, ”Where have you been?” on his return. Oh, Perry. If even Ray – the LUNATIC – thinks you’re coming on a bit strong, maybe you need to dial back the devotion and calm the eff down? Just a suggestion.